Today is my Airplane day. The day I came over from Korea and become a part of the Wilkins family . My parents did an amazing job of celebrating this day every year as a child. I basically had a second birthday either celebrating it through planning our family vacation around this day, taking friend out to dinner with me, eating special foods and of course talking about the “Brandi story”, the story of how I came to be apart of their family and all the happening around it. I remember being really young and thinking wow I was re-born on an airplane… hence I have an airplane tattoo on my left arm. Little did I know at such a young age that being re-born on an airplane is actually what happened. This day 26 years ago, I took a trip across an ocean and over continents, I had the birth canal thing already mastered… to meet a red-headed woman and a brown-haired man. They took me in as their own. I had a double ear infection and wasn’t the happiest little chubby thing, but they snuggled me and loved me unconditionally.
I was their daughter. Just like that. At 6 months of age, I was Linda and Don’s pride and joy. This isn’t everyone’s story but it’s mine. Now fast forward 26 years to my story now. Being adopted and being a mommy through adoption myself. Feeling the same feelings my mom felt for me. This overwhelming feeling of love, that at times gives the typical dry eyes some moisture. Today my little girl only added to my celebration with her laughter and her singing. Yes she sings if I sing her lullaby to her or if she’s over tired.
She also added to my celebration today by giving me courage. I looked at her this morning and told her, hey guess what, today is the day that marks what makes us the same.. She had not idea what I was talking about and drooled all over, it’s mommy’s airplane day. I tried to tell her the story and had to stop… at the first line. No I wasn’t crying, I was wondering. So this woman on an Island off the coast of Korea, had Mommy… WHO IS THAT WOMAN… my mind raced. Now let me take a quick bunny trail… I received really sound advice from another adoptee friend, Angela Tucker, that I need to not live my adoption story though my kids and that I should try to get closure as soon as possible. I then promptly recontacted with the Korean social worker, I had been working with 7 years ago and she told me to fill out some paper-work due to new regulation. I sent a picture of myself and a formal note stating what I’d be looking for if I was able to make contact with my birth-mother.
I filled that paper out and sent it the day we got the call for Vera-lou. I didn’t think about it again, cause you know if you’ve read the previous post a LOT happened. Well the day we landed in Texas to meet Vera-lou’s birthmother… I received and e-mail that they located my birth mom… WHAT! I then quickly remembered my fumbling through the paper work weeks prior. It was quite crazy and I found myself trying to hold back excitement. I need to be in this time for my baby. I need all my emotional energy for the at the time “maybe” baby. But come on… God only writes cool stuff like that. But being the realist that I am and needing to stuff it … They told me they were going to send her my information via TELEGRAM. Alright blog world, WHAT THE HECK? Is Korea that far behind? Am I speaking to the wrong people? Tell me. I haven’t been brave enough to talk about my birthmother these days,but I think about her more than ever. I need everyone’s prayer, if God can give us sweet Vera-lou to be apart of our family, then God can introduce me to my Birthmother. I just want to bring Vera-lou to her and explain to her she’s adopted and it’s something I pride myself on. This is a compacted issue for me. I can honestly say Vera-lou and I will have completely different adoption stories and I love that… It’s totally different to be a mother and an adoptee… more on that later. But because of the openness in Vera-lou’s story, I have hope and courage to ask. I don’t need second birthdays, I had those for 26 years and counting but I need to tell a Korean woman to not be ashamed anymore, to be proud and well for another miracle to happen, as heaven here on earth…
So if you know anything about this process, I timidly ask for your advice. If you know nothing- awesome a lot less scary for me… pray. Pray for me. Pray for my birth mother. And thank Jesus for Vera-lou’s story..