What? How is it possible… I don’t have a big belly… I am not waddling but it’s true… We are in our third trimester of our adoption or the stage before the baby comes! This could be the longest third trimester or the shortest, you see we’ve completed our homestudy, handed in our profile book , and are officially waiting.
1.Completed our homestudy…
Meant having had three visits to our house and a detailed study written about our little family of two. The document will be used in order to give a birth family information about us and the lawyer who finalizes our adoption will use it for legal purposes.
2. Handing in our profile book….
The assignment was, ‘Please create a picture book describing your family, this book will be shown to possible birth families that might choose you, please show what you are about, what you like to do ,and what you can promise for your child.’ Now insert us, creative couple–a photographer and a passionate adopted perfectionist. Yes, we looked through thousands of pictures, wrote then re-wrote and designed. No big deal, just hours upon hours of love. I will un bashfully say the book is awesome and like they say, once you become a parent you’ll do anything for your child… This may have been the first story we’ll have for baby ebersole about how Mommy and Daddy want it just right, so God could bring him/her to us.
3.We are officially waiting… !
This means that we are receiving e-mails of possible cases. These e-mails give us descriptions of the mother’s medical history and where she is in her pregnancy ect. We got our first e-mail last week… it was the most exciting moment but there were a lot of extra medical fees, we personally didn’t think we could take on. The other craziest part was the mom was due in two weeks and well.. let’s just say after praying and having peace to say ‘no’… we continued nesting, cleaning and praying.
If we had said yes to email number one, we would have had our profile shown to the birth mother and then she could have chosen us. We could get an email saying she wanted to speak to us and then we’d talk to her on the phone hopefully. There are cases where babies have already been born and the mother leaves them and then we’d be picking up our littleness, they call this a stroke drop.
All this said we are unsure, how frequent these emails will be and this is the craziest part of this whole process- the unknown. If we could write you and tell you it is all rainbows and ease, it would be a lie from the pit of hell. It’s hard not to know. It’s hard to imagine and not be fearful of your life just suddenly completely changing all because of one email. It’s stressful to plan around this unknown date for both of our jobs and well let’s face it we just want the baby to come! We want to hold it, know it and know if it’s a BOY or a GIRL.
Adoption is amazing but complexly tragic. It starts with a beautiful, brave mother carrying a baby for 9 months with all the hormonal and body changes to then either choose complete strangers to raise their baby or give it to the adoption agency to choose… Yes, Danny and I still get tears in our eyes thinking about holding our child for the first time but the battle that is being fought for this little person is real, for the birthmother of our little one deciding to keep or give up their child for adoption.The battle is happening in our family as we pray for God to give us peace in a rather uncomfortable place. But this is where the beauty in the process is taking place. It is quite strange, or simply unnatural to some – our pursuit of the risky path of adoption at our age. But our trust is in God and not in our own ability or human logic. It’s remembering God is faithful, when we worry that we’ll not have the strength if we are placed with a birth mom that might decided to change her mind last minute. It’s allowing our own selfish desires to have this fairy-tale of becoming parents and realizing is not what we’re called too, we’re called to live in the unknown and confront peoples comments that can sometimes be difficult. We’re called to continuing to fundraise and most importantly we are called to let him make a redemption story out of this journey.
Our promise to the birth mom page:
Please contiune to pray for us.. we cannot thank you for all of your support! We love you all!